Christmas Hearts

In the midst of all that is Christmas...in the middle of the shopping, the parties, the feasting, the wrapping, the worshipping, the singing...something else happens. We get nostalgic, maybe even melancholy, especially if we are on the far side of 50.

This is certainly a truth for Tim and I this year. I knew I was missing loved ones and traditions long past in a deeper way this year. I've felt a deep inner need to reach out and try to make "nice" with some long estranged relatives. Jesus's command to love everyone, even my enemies, has been weighing heavily on my heart. A meme glimpsed on Facebook questioned "If you were arrested for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?" added to the conviction I needed to act. So, I have been making a very intentional effort to love everyone, mend bridges, reach out, bring those I have "lost" over the years back into the fold, so to speak.

What I didn't know until just this week, in the days leading up to Tim's birthday yesterday, is that he is feeling the same thing. He was born the middle child of seven. He has been sort of the black sheep his whole adult life...a brother they all claim to love, but never fully included, either. He (and me and the kids by extention) has been shunned, criticized, blamed, used when they need something, often over-looked or forgotten. Our kids have not received the same treatment as his siblings' children. If something went wrong when all the kids were together, our kids were always the ones blamed.

I mention all of that to give you some background as to why over the years Tim has pulled further and further away from his family. The last few years he has barely spoken to them. They have called here and he has refused to come to the phone, having me make excuses for why he can't. We have been very isolated from the family other than my contact with them on Facebook. We are only included in invitations to family events that require a gift. 

But this week, I learned that pull of nostalgia is working on Tim. It is probably a combination of Christmas and his birthday. Yesterday he turned 59. Time is most likely weighing on him. There is his own health. He hasn't felt all that great for several years now and doctors can't find the answer. Then there is the fact that both of his parents passed in their 60's and that two of his siblings have passed, neither one even making it to 60. I think the ticking away of time is growing louder.

Whatever it is, I was stunned on Tuesday when I saw that the man who rarely clicks "Like" on a comment on Facebook and never, ever posts anything of his own, posted "I love you" on the pages of all his sisters! Then on Wednesday I found that he'd posted "I love you. Have a good day." on the kids and my pages. He is doing that same mending of fences that I am.

I do love the way Christmas works on hearts, don't you? Have you experienced this in yourself or witnessed it in others this Christmas season? Do share, please!